Want a minute-by-minute recap of Outlander Season 3 episode 1, “The Battle Joined”? We give all the details….

Do you find yourself gabbing obsessively about Outlander to your friends and family? Wishing your Sunday nights included a living room full of people with whom to watch, discuss, comment, cheers, jeers and well, experience alllllll the feels? Dinna fash, Obsessenach—you are not alone.

Good news—we can get new family and friends pour ourselves a dram and, through the magic of technology, enjoy it together! As we brought to you during Season 2, we’ll be LIVE blogging all the episodes in Season 3. Like the Outlander Cast podcast, it will be SPOILER FREE for non-book readers.

Not into distractions during your visit to the World of Outlander? That’s okay! Our LIVE blogs double as episodic recaps to serve as a trusty viewing companion on your second, third and umpteenth re-watches (hey, we get it).

So get all your post-18th Century gadgets ready and settle in, because the best things in life should be shared with a buddy. Hi, buddy.

Now let the show begin…

 

[8:00 pm] I do so appreciate this “previously on Outlander” bit because it’s been 14 months since I last watched Outlander and I can’t remember anything that happened, SAID NO ONE EVER.  But please, proceed.

[8:01 pm] Loving this opening sequence! We’ve got new images with which to fawn over and contemplate all the magic of Season 3 that lies ahead.  And our beloved Skye Boat song has gotten a new arrangement!

[8:02 pm] New Outlander! This is happening. IT’S FINALLY HAPPENING.  That is all. Breathe, Ashley. BREATHE.

[8:04 pm] I recall reading that, much like the Battle of Prestonpans, a lot of the Battle of Culloden was shot inside a tent.  And yet, the howling wind noises, gray overtones and body count in overdrive is enough to make you feel as if you’re tromping on that field yourself.

[8:05 pm] And the Emmy goes to . . . Sam Heughan’s eyes and measured gasping.

[8:06 pm] Mark me, that better be the end of the Mark Mes.  Forever. Thank you kindly.

[8:08 pm] The moment where the grating man-child that is Bonnie Prince Charlie realizes just what a boy he’s been in trying win while playing a man’s game.

[8:09 pm] Death by weeding – something my husband often prophesizes as his fate on a typical Saturday, and yet, he saw this and offered “My bad. I take that back.”

[8:10 pm] MURTAGH!!! The way these two just interacted with each other – the looks, the humor, the shared brotherhood – melted me, even amidst the icy backdrop of battle.

[8:11 pm] This episode just switched to a different Instagram filter. The appearance of Black Jack Randall and Jamie’s hero shot went 50 shades of fiery orange.  Though, Jamie’s intention to end this once and for all is most certainly fueled by a fire in his belly the size of a thousand flames.

[8:12 pm]  Rest in . . . ah to hell with that.  As my fellow blogger and pal, Teddie, would say G’BYE. Thou shall not be missed. (Though to be clear, I do hold a torch for Tobias Menzies as an actor).

[8:13 pm] I knew this scene with Claire wandering dream-like through the battlefield was coming, but my god, a still EW publicity shot could never do it justice.  The ethereal beauty of it, the music, you name it. Breathtaking.

[8:14 pm] Blue dress, gold dress my arse, Blake Larsen – “let me be” is so clearly what this man says.  And Rupert, DAMN good to see you!

[8:15 pm]  My god, GUT ME. The dragonfly in amber.  That was painful but perfect! I love how they’ve used it as a constant – as a physical manifestation of Jamie and Claire’s tried love story – strung through the series. And yet, my hubs: “what’s that orange thing?” Men.

[8:16 pm] Great Scot, we’re back in 1948! And in Bahston. How you like ‘dem transition apples.

[8:17 pm] And here we go, bring on the sensitive Frank that we’re supposed to feel squishy about.  Laying it on prettttttty thick, Ron . . .  err, I mean Frank.

[8:18 pm] Not to find joy in someone else’s frustration, but Claire’s exasperated JHRC moments are what’s been missing from my life for the past 14 months. I am certain.

[8:19 pm] God love this woman. Plan B.

[8:20 pm] Acid reflux in full effect at this new gal pal’s Stepford Wife bantering (though I know it was status quo for the time) and the “you’ve got to look pretty when you meet the boss” comment. Ugh. We’re with you, Claire. We’re with you.

[8:22 pm] I’m not going to steer us off course into the dangerous waters of politics, but boy does this whole mansplaining exchange feels eerily applicable.  Side note: haberdasher – a lovely word not used enough. Try it. It feels bumpy and fun rolling off the tongue.

[8:24 pm] Claire’s “f*ck you very much” smile just matched what we were all thinking toward the new boss, though I’m impressed by her filter. And that arrogant asshat is going to eat his words later.  That’s all the spoiler I’ll give, I promise.  And with a potty mouth no less.

[8:25 pm] Feel what you want about Frank, but dammit can Tobias rock a fedora.

[8:26 pm] Dearest Jamie, what happened to Murtagh (or what will Ron do with Murtagh) is the question we’ve all been asking too.  And with this ambiguous door left open, I’m clinging to hope because this is one re-write I’d support wholly.

[8:27 pm] Gulp. All they get is an hour . . . which also matches how I feel about this episode ending and me wanting more, but I’ll try to exercise a bit of sensitivity here given the setting.

[8:29 pm] What am I missing? Quick! Someone explain to me why this bird gets its own Bear McCreary score and some solitary tears from Claire? Is Jamie a bird? Is their love a bird? Or is Claire going all “Dear God, make me a bird. So I can fly far. Far, far away from here” Jenny from Forrest Gump on us?

[8:30 pm] Dare I say they’re falling into step in their forced new domestic life? Instagrammable breakfast, smiley banter, routine.  Eek.

[8:33 pm] Welp. Spoke too soon.

[8:34 pm] “Nope, that’s not what this is about . . . it’s about THAT.”

[8:35 pm] I realize it’s sort of beside the point, but was that a vase she just threw at him? Because dammit she always wanted a vase. You guys, FRANK MIGHT BE THE REASON SHE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS.

[8:35 pm] What a gorgeous frame – split between his lingering in the front door, her in the adjacent room out of his view, but squarely in ours. Tortured emotion across both their faces. Can someone go ahead and meme or gif that for me please?

[8:36 pm] Is it me or did Rupert just send off the Weasley twins from Harry Potter to be executed?

[8:37 pm] “She’s gooooone.”

[8:38 pm] “I get to see the two of you together.” So. Many. Feelings.

[8:39 pm] My nose is drippy and pink too, Jamie. Rest in Bountiful Peace, Rupert Thomas Alexander MacKenzie.  You were a damn fine lad and ye shall be missed. You too, Grant O’Rourke.

[8:40 pm] Frank, might I recommend a drop or two of lavender oil to help you sleep?  What, too soon? I know, I know, IT WILL ALWAYS BE TOO SOON.

[8:43 pm] James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser of Broch Turach.  Hero moment #2 of this episode.

[8:44 pm] “Does the name John Grey mean anything to you?” Friends, we’ve arrived at foreshadowing.

[8:45 pm] I’m not sure this is what millions of women on the Interwebs meant when they fantasized about getting Jamie Fraser horizontal, but my word! Sam Heughan is acting the hell out of this episode with mostly just his eyes and body language given that he’s been flat on his back the majority of the episode with only a few lines of dialogue muttered.

[8:47 pm] Thank Scottish stars for this debt of honor, Brother Grey. Phew.

[8:48 pm] This you’re-not-my-doctor moment had me hoping that comedian Ken Jeong was about to bounce on screen in a reprisal of his memorable Knocked Up role.

[8:49 pm] “The father’s waiting room is down the hall and to the left. Just follow the smell of cigarettes and flop sweat.” Amazing, and true.

[8:50 pm] She does have a pretty little head . . . but, between the traumatic delivery and loss of Faith and her aiding Jenny through labor, this lack of control about her own birth plan has to be brutal for Claire, given that she knows too much as both a mother and a nurse.

[8:51 pm] And when he woke, he was trussed up in the wagon [no chickens this time], jolting down the road toward . . . Lallybroch! WE’RE HOME.

[8:52 pm] I know that’s not Jamie and we want Jamie because that’s how it should be, but my womb just quaked at this scene. Way to betray me, uterus.

[8:53 pm] “Frank, I’ve been so horrid to you” – Ron’s not-so-subtle message to us? We get it, Ron. WE GET IT.

[8:54 pm] “Where’d she get the red hair?” GULP. Annnndd we’re back to zero.

[8:56 pm]  Whoa boy. Next week’s episode will be brought to you by the cruel makers of sexual deprivation. Jamie’s dry spell, Castaway Jamie and the clip-on beard, Claire’s “it’s not you, it’s me. No wait, it’s you” ongoing struggle with Frank, meddling siblings, forced Tinder dates in a cave and so much more. And I canna wait! Droughtlander’s over, baby!

[8:59 pm] OUTLANDER IS BACK! And that episode was a square-between-the-eyes reminder of all we’ve come to love about this beloved show. The production value of the cinematography that feels more theatrical than television – clearly on display throughout a moment as epic as the Battle of Culloden but also in something as simple as how they chose bring us into Claire and Frank’s Boston home, and their new life. The main actors’ ability to convey so much with their body language –  whether it be Sam Heughan’s haunting eyes, Tobias’ facial twitching or Caitriona’s defensive posture – in addition to delivering beautiful dialogue that is worthy of recognition all its own. When your heart is in your throat and you’re worn out from the emotional toll of all that’s transpiring, the pops of humor find their way to you in a most welcome way. And the music. Oh you wondrous creature you with the music, Bear McCreary. Someone stop me, because I could keep going.  And I will, each and every episode throughout Season 3, join Outlander Cast for our live blogging that also serves as your post-show episode recap!

For our fellow Obsessenachs in the path of Hurricane Irma this week, we’re sending safe wishes your way.  Until next week, friends . . . be well and Slainte!